Can you like what you see in the mirror?

Yes! You can like what you see in the mirror!

But first, how does your day start? Anything like this?

You glance in the mirror first thing  and notice how tired you look. And when you inspect more closely you see the eye creases from being squashed against your pillow (or not), and you think urgh, when did that happen? I need to cover that up or just wear a face scarf all day.

If you entertain yourself for a few seconds longer you mentally comment on the freckles, scars or pimples in the ‘wrong’ place. Why couldn’t I just have one tiny mole in the perfect place to look sexy?

And if you’ve got a full-length mirror, you might spend a few more moments on the size or the shape of your body. You notice your arms, your legs, your tummy, or any other body part that your attention always magnetises to. I’m so… (fill in self-deprecating phrase here), if only I was thinner, more muscly, bustier, taller, shorter. I wish I looked more like (fill in name of model whose pictures are often photo-shopped to within an inch of their lives).

Is that a disdainful glance at your body?

So do you like what you see in the mirror? Perhaps not. Will you ever like what you see in the mirror? With practice, consistency and kindness, YES! It’s easy to think that if you ‘just’ botox away those lines, or lose some of that fat on your thighs that you’ll like what you see in the mirror. I hate to break it to you, but psychology shows that if you have body dissatisfaction, changing something external will most likely not help. It’s actually your thoughts and beliefs about yourself that control your levels of body satisfaction. Good news: you’re in control + changing thoughts and beliefs is free and doesn’t harm your body. Bad news: It’s not an overnight solution.

You might be thinking, great Kali, thanks for that, but how do I do that so that I can like what I see in the mirror? There are many ways, and I’ll share a few with you right here.

Start your day right.

Even before you’ve set foot outside your bed and gone anywhere near a mirror, say something nice to yourself. Not just nice, but supportive and kind and gentle. I start my day with my hand on my heart or belly, saying Kali, you are enough. And I say it enough times until I feel it sink in. Or I start the day with, I am powerful or I am creative, or something else, depending on what energy I would like more of in that day. Ask yourself: What do I need to hear today? What will make me feel stronger, more beautiful, more confident? Then say it to yourself (you don’t have to say it out loud, but that’s pretty cool too).

Then to the mirror…

  • Smile:

    When you reach the mirror, smile. If that creates creases, be thankful for all the smiling you must have done in your life to create those! Smile at the face you see looking back at you because guess what, that’s your best friend right there. And if you don’t feel like her best friend, start cultivating that lifelong friendship right now with a dose of kindness, compassion and gentle words. If you’re feeling extra brave, smile, wink and say hi honey.

  • Skin deep

    What you first see is only skin deep. Underneath that reflection is so much more. You are a whole human being with an amazing brain, a multitude of thoughts, dreams, challenges, and a huge heart that sometimes takes your breath away. Look into your eyes and for a moment think of who that person is underneath these ‘flaws’ that are trained to jump out at you. Don’t let what you think you ‘should’ look like define how happy you are in this remarkable body you call home. Don’t let society, the media, any person tell you what makes you beautiful, amazing, wonderful. You are unique. You are the only human being in the whole world who looks, thinks and acts as you do. Think about that for a moment.

  • Gratitude

    What part of the reflection can you cultivate gratitude for? Start small. Maybe it’s the way the colour in your iris spills into a magical pattern that looks as though you were high up in the plane looking back at Earth. Or when you smile you get a small indent where a dimple could go and it makes you look cheeky. Perhaps it’s that those legs you think should look different have taken you on so many incredible adventures that have shaped who you are today. Getting the picture?

When did we stop thinking we were so awesome?

This is not just a morning thing. It’s an any time of day, rest of your life kind of thing. Practice. And then practice some more, and keep practicing until it feels normal. Fake it til you make it! Be conscious of your words, every word that you say to yourself. Would you say those things to a best friend? If not, consider rewording them for yourself. Inject some kindness.

I think you are amazing. I think you are enough. And I think you are beautiful just as you are…now stop reading this and go out and start believing those things for yourself!

Do you do any of these already? Let me know. Or share some of your own practices that help you to like or even love the reflection you see in the mirror.

I’m Back! A Bee Sensual Update

So where in the world has Kali been?

I realise you haven’t heard from me much in the last six months, so I figured a Bee Sensual update was well overdue. You see there has been a lot going on, on all levels. There has been journeying on many levels too, and I am coming out the other side with renewed energy and thoughts of all my lovely Bee Sensual fans and what Spring is bringing for you.

Some of you may know that for the last five years I’ve had a real struggle with a physical healing issue. It’s created days of pain, unable to stand for too long or go too many places, and sometimes I’ve just been too sore to do what’s necessary for a lot of things, including make beautiful batches of Bee Sensual. It also left me with little energy often to drop in and say ‘hi’ or write blog posts to share.

This year I decided I would explore ALL options to finding ways to heal this once and for all.

The glow of an Indian sunset!

I went to Australia twice and unfortunately that did not work out in the way I had planned. After that I decided to follow the ‘last resort’ – a Research Institute I had heard about, and been in contact with, in India. It was time. And so in June this year, Harlan, two dear friends and I made a ‘last minute decision’ to travel to Chandigarh, India, North of New Delhi (to read more about this journey, you can check out my personal blog).

It was the BEST decision ever, and long story short I am no longer in pain! It is like a whole new world in some ways, and being able to sit and stand and drive around without thinking twice is uber exciting 🙂

What that means for Bee Sensual…

…is that I have refreshed energy and I am excited to be getting back into it – making, dreaming, creating and reconnecting with you! What I really would LOVE to know from you is some ideas for blog titles pretty please…what do you want to be hearing more about, knowing more about, enjoying more of?

So much love to you beautiful soul! xx

DIY Christmas Presents – make your own scrubs

DIY Christmas

Are you looking for fun DIY Christmas present ideas that you will enjoy creating?

Last year I held a scrub evening where people could create handmade Christmas presents for friends and family, and since I didn’t do it this year, I thought why not share some of the recipes with you!

What ingredients to use?

Basically you want to make this as fun and easy as possible, and therefore we want to use what you’ve already got in the pantry. Any suggestions that I make that you don’t have, use your creative spark and substitute it for something similar. We want presents to be an enjoyable experience for all parties involved 🙂

Which exfoliant to choose?

Sugar – contains glycolic acid, and alpha hydroxyl acid that’s great for exfoliating.

Salt – Epsom salts – when in contact with water, the magnesium of Epsom salts (magnesium sulphate) is easily absorbed through your skin. This is believed to be the best way to boost your magnesium (aside from through food). Most of us need to increase our magnesium because it is estimated that well over half of us are deficient, since it diy-coffee-scrubis depleted whenever we are suffering from stress or anxiety. Magnesium is required for 100s of biochemical reactions in our body – Google its benefits to the body and all the things it can help with.

Coffee – the caffeine in coffee, amongst others, is a great stimulant of circulation and lymph drainage. When you’re mixing up a fresh batch at home that you’re going to use right away, you can use preloved coffee grinds.

Which oils? (try and use virgin oils where possible)

Olive oil – contains high levels of antioxidants and is packed with vitamins, minerals and natural fatty acids. It contains vitamins E and A that help in hydrating skin and sustaining skin’s elasticity and softness. Moreover, it helps to regenerate skin cells. It’s awesome stuff that’s been used on skin forever and is usually in your pantry.

Almond oil – rich in vitamins A, B and E, which are great for skin health. It helps to maintain moisture levels of the skin and gets absorbed really quickly – without blocking the pores. Almond oil is deeply penetrating and nourishing, while soothing irritated and dry skin.

Rice bran oil or grapeseed oil will work beautifully as well. Stay away from canola oil and any super refined oils as they have no nourishment left in them.

Which essential oils?

Whatever you have on hand and that you love the smell of! Remember our skin is sensitive to essential oils, so start off with small amounts in your mix and go from there.

What recipe outline?

Chai Spice Sugar Scrubdiy-sugar-scrub
• 1 cup sugar
• ¼ ½ cup oil
• ½ tsp cardamom
• ½ tsp cinnamon
• ¼ tsp cloves
• ¼ nutmeg
• ¼ ginger

Candy Cane Sugar Scrub
• 1 cup sugar
• ¼ ½ cup oil
• 1 tsp vanilla essence
• 25 drops peppermint essential oil (EO)
• natural colouring/dried petals or mint for half the batch to create stripes

Coffee Scrub

• ½ cup ground coffee
• ½ cup sugar
• ¼ ½ cup oil
• ½ tsp cinnamon (or more)
• ½ tsp vanilla essence

diy-christmas-foot-scrubSalt Foot Scrub
• 1 cup salts
• ¼ ½ cup oil
• 5-10 drops peppermint or other EO of your choice

Mix and match, play around, get creative, have fun! If you like a drier scrub that’s more ‘scrubby’ then use less oil, otherwise go for more. Start with ¼ cup and see if you want to add…it’s all going to be wonderful either way 🙂

The salt scrubs can double as a nurturing bath salt mix and you can add petals for colour.

Bottle in recycled jars of your choice, create a label, and you have a perfect deliciously natural-scented DIY Christmas or anytime gift made with love!

Do you have any scrummy natural DIY ideas you’d like to share with us?

DIY Christmas Scrubs PDF Download